Spilled Coffee and Awesome Shirts

They say you shouldn't cry over spilled milk, but does the same principle hold true for spilled coffee? I mean, coffee is second only to crude oil as far as trading commodities go, so I should think that if one, in theory, could cry over spilled milk that one would utterly bawl over spilled coffee. In addition, one can drink coffee with milk, but also without it, making milk a mere efficacy that essentially glorifies coffee, not the other way around. Of course, one could make the "vice-versa" argument, but really, who drinks their milk with coffee?? That notion simply shames reason.

Anyway, though I wouldn't normally cry over spilled coffee, today I had experience that showed capabilities to create certain circumstances that could prove to have been unpleasant, though in all likely-hood, not worth tears. Here is what happened:

It was 8:55 of the clock, and I was driving my 2005 Hyundai Tuscon to school. Coffee in one hand, steering wheel in the other, I was happily listening to tobyMac on the radio. Okay, I'll admit, I might've been actively listening to tobyMac, which goes to say I may have been singing along... 

*facepalm* You can see where this is going, right? So of course I would spill coffee all over my pants five minutes before my 9 of the clock history class was to start. 

Peanut Gallery Detour: Of the clock is actually the spelled out contraction of o'clock.  Back in the day, My English teacher would demand that his students spell out all contractions (e.i can't-->cannot, wouldn't-->would not, ext.), save one. He thought it impractical and unnecessary to spell out the contraction "o'clock," and thus premised us to use this contraction. I, however, happen to like spelling out this contraction especially well. So anyway...

Epic humility lesson in the making right? Absolutely shocked as the coffee was hot-leaning-scalding, I took in the developments quite calmly, as I managed to keep the car on the road. Letting out a deep breath, I anxiously looked down at my pants, though I knew what I was to find. Amusingly enough (now), the coffee had spared all but one area. Without going into grave details, it appeared that I had had a rather unfortunate accident; one that was the upshot of coffee consumed, instead of coffee spilled.

In other words, it looked like I had wet myself.

I slumped in my seat, unnerved. Great, I thought, that's all I need. Looking at the clock, I realized that a return to the house was not an option, as it was now 8:56 of the clock. Swallowing my pride as I had no more coffee left swallow, I realized that I had already arrived at the college anyway. I was doomed. Parking my car in a secluded corner, I unloaded and upon standing upright, examined the spot in the more natural light of the sun. Yep, I was doomed. Without a word, I grabbed my book-bag, and attempting to console myself, I repeated in my head, It doesn’t matter, I’m here to learn; just focus on learning AND DON”T MAKE EYE CONTACT!!

I had been fortunate enough to have not met anyone along my journey to my classroom, so upon arriving at the classroom door, I paused and took a deep breath. Looking down once more and wincing because I was doomed,  I walked through the doors. My teacher was just setting herself up to teach when I walked through the doors, allowing me for the collective attention of the classroom. I wore a faked smile, and made my way down to the back row, attempting to look "non-chalant." “Nice shirt,” some guy said as I walked past. Huh? I sat down, and the girl I had chosen to sit next to said warmly, “wow, I love your shirt!” “Thanks!” I said, delightedly stunned. I looked down at my shirt. In all my worrying, I had forgotten that I had worn my favorite “nerd” shirt. Ah, this is looking up, I thought happily. Yes, I had lost some very good coffee along the way but, hey, I was alive, right?

So, of course it only makes sense that after all my worrying about my pants, my shirt would be the thing that received the attention.

Logical Explanation? I have several:

So maybe my shirt was just so awesome that it drew all attention away from my pants by sheer virtue. I mean, it is pretty awesome :D 
Or maybe everyone was just so eager to avert impending awkwardness, they actively complimented my shirt so as to draw attention away from my pants. Mmm, not as flattering, no but yes, that could be it. 
*gasp* Maybe the two complimenters were the only ones out of thirty who were actually paying attention to my shirt. Hhmm, the odds at this point aren't looking that great.

Mmm, or maybe I'm just making a big deal out of this...

Anyway, the moral of this story is that you shouldn’t cry over spilled coffee…

…especially if you’re wearing a totally awesome shirt like me :-)